After the way I lifted on Monday, I was already a bit apprehensive about going in to lift tonight. I think coming off a shit night just really does something to your head, you know? I’m not usually too much of a head case, even though lifting does get in my head a bit, but I think my friends knew I was more off than usual. How do I know? Well this morning one of them hit me up on facebook to make sure I was even coming IN to lift tonight. You know who you are. Thank you. <3

Plus, in addition to my own mental pressure from Monday, I just had a really rough day overall with work and regular life combined and weighing down on me emotionally. By the time I finally got to the box, I was, frankly, a royal mess. Talking with my coach after the workout, he said something to the effect of, “normally you’re happy and you just radiate positive energy and infect everyone around you and it’s such a joy. But today when you were feeling down it was just so out of character for you; I was really worried.”

Ugh. I *so* don’t want to be that person who brings everyone down. But when I missed a 95# snatch during the EMOM OHS work we were doing, I was honestly afraid I was going to hurt myself and I just got SO frustrated. BOTH of my coaches independently came over to ask if I was ok. Of course I said I was fine but I got the “are you sure?” verbal question and also the sideeye of “I know you’re not ok” when I answered that I was fine. I ended up cleaning to push-press to OHS for the EMOM but I was NOT happy about it. Strangely my frustration channeled into some weird alternate universe where I could do DUs, though. I decided to just shut my brain off for metcon and I think I did passably well, but I wasn’t happy with my performance overall in class.

Once we were done I had my hour break between WOD and oly, and I literally plopped down in a chair in misery/aggrevation. I was planning to sit there and wallow in my lameness, but one of my friends decided that it was time to chat. He definitely kept me distracted for the most part until ANOTHER of my friends showed up. I mentioned to him that I was feeling shitty and I earned myself a sweet glomp-style spin-hug. It was kind of epic, no lie. Theeeennnn finally, oly started. I was actually a *tiny* bit excited for oly because I had prepped 3 new spotify playlists for us to try out… so that was a bonus. Plus both of my oly coaches were there that night, so that was really cool too. They both have very different cueing styles, so it’s always great to have them both around.

I started up my generic oly playlist, and the first song that came on…. my classmate of the sweet spin-hug complimented me on the selection. So that lifted my spirits a little extra, which was pretty solid. We started out with some triple extension KBS, which were new to me, and my coach had me go with a 20kg bell… which in my head is SUPER heavy, so I was kind of shocked. But supposedly it worked. So yay. Then we did some good mornings and my knee was feeling kind of tweaky, so I was a little worried… and then we moved into a Clean, Jerk, Clean Grip OHS complex.

Now, we did Clean Grip OHS  (cgohs) last week and I LOVED them (I was even working with more weight than some of the guys, which was kind of ridiculously awesome, if you ask me) because they’re a strength exercise paired with mobility, which is one of my assets. When we worked them in last week they were in a push-press, 3x cgohs complex. This time it was just clean, jerk, cgohs… Long story short, I hit 135 and just stalled the eff out. I missed HARD on cleaning 145. Nothing bad happened, I just pulled and missed. And pulled and missed. By this time, my two friends who had looked out for me earlier, as well as my second coach (the one who isn’t usually there) had started banding together to encourage me. My coach gave me a cue for my second pull, told me to get some water, and then come back and try it. I gave him a skeptical look, but acquiesced.

Well… I missed it.

My coach told me to chill the eff out, shake it off, and try it again, faster.

So I decided to get into/out of my head, I would swap on one of the songs I was excited to lift to when I made my playlist. The first one I saw was “Warrior” by Ke$ha (I would totally wear that outfit to a CFN function too!). Double clicked. Stalked back to my bar.

I set up, pulled, and I hit that effing clean. It wasn’t pretty, but I hit it. And I got up, and then you can bet your ass I jerked (ok it was kind of a push jerk/shoulder press but WHATEVER)… and yeah. You KNOW I CGOHSed that shit. I had to stabilize a little bit, but honestly the CGOHS was the easiest damn part of the complex for me. Yeah. I don’t know either. But, I will take it. You know why? Because that’s a PR on my C&J AND on my OHS.

I can’t even. Like I just can’t.

Take that, shit day. Eat it.